Ian started packing the cards slowly, focusing distractively on any appealing image. He wasn't really observing the cards; he was, without even realizing it, doing exactly what he should, letting thoughts and feelings flow through him.
The room was dark, only enlightened by a small bed side table lamp and a shy light coming through the window. Ian sat crossed legged on the floor, at the end of the bed, only wearing a pair of jeans. His hair was still wet, from the hot shower an hour ago, and was allowing tiny drops to race through the vampire's back and shoulders.
He turned a card in his hand and admired it. A figure stands rigid in the center, wrapped in a black cloak. He seems to be mourning over three spilled cups in front of him. Ian looked closely at the black figure and he felt sorry for him. The poor guy seemed so broken, so lost... like he had been carefully, almost religiously, carrying the cups but tripped along the way and all the water spilled.
"I know the feeling... "
Ian remembered the first time he saw Samuel. It was what? 8 years ago? "yep, something like that", Ian thought. He was at his second year in College. They met in one of those student night parties Ian had been dragged into. He never quite understood how they ended up making out in the bathroom! Parties weren't really Ian's thing, neither was occasional snogging! But somehow, they ended up seeing each other soon after, then having dinner, going to the cinema and eventually falling in love.
They were very alike, "or so I thought at the time". Both wanted to change the world, and both believed they could! Together they created ideals and discussed future plans, until both realized passion could only be directed in one way at a time.
So they split up. A mutual, simple decision. "No fighting, no cheating, no resent", they just needed time to focus on the future.
"You'll be proud of me the next time we meet" had been Ian's final words.
The vampire kicked one of his abandoned boots, slapping it into the wall.
"damm him!" After seeing Samuel years later, Ian knew he had failed his promise. Samuel would never be proud of a murderer. But it looked like Adam's blood, even strong enough to rise someone from the dead, didn't kill his ..."tragically romantic self", as Ian added cynically. He still believed they would find a way.
"I could understand if Samuel needed company, I really could!", for what companion could a vampire be? "We would never be able to share the life we planned..."
"I understand, really, I do...", but seeing Samuel with Marlene had really hurt Ian, more than he expected Samuel ever could.
He was hurt because, even in all his confusion, he loved Samuel and that didn't seem to matter much.
He was hurt because he never expected Samuel to act in such a way. "Couldn't he waste 5 minutes just to say he was ok?!"
He was hurt because he had been in love for years for someone who was not what he thought!
But what hurt Ian the most was realizing they never really had a chance.
He wiped a tear before realizing he had been crying for quite some time. "No way! Not for him!", Ian said to his dimly lit room. "Never again".
He tried to restrain himself not to scare Samuel. Every night he hoped Samuel would be more used to his deformed presence. He told him everything he could, he explain everything he knew. Ian was ashamed of himself and his actions near Samuel.
For Samuel, he had been denying and holding back his vampire side. He was never truly his new self, nor could he ever be human. The duality was sometimes unbearable, every night seemed to pull him in to two opposite directions...but Ian was decided to be torn apart before letting go.
"Never again", the vampire repeated out loud.
He looked again at the card and to the black figure. He was about to put it way when he notice a small detail. The card didn't have three cups, but five. Other two were hidden behind the crying man and they were still full. The figure was just so absorbed in those he knocked over that he didn't notice the other two.
Ian smiled at himself and he put the card down in the box.
He picked up another and turned it.